Saturday, 20 February 2010

Apple's puritanical crusade against jiggling titty continues.

So, as it happens, my first post on this blog is about boobs. Hmmm, ah well, start as I mean to go on.

It has been impossible to browse the App Store without coming across 'Asian Boobs', or some variety there of. And don't get me wrong, I was as sick as the next person of sifting through hundreds of them in lifestyle, entertainment, photography, just to find what i wanted. But this latest move from the big nobs at Cupertino is a little puritanical. iWobble Boobs might have boobs in the title, but it didn't actually contain any images. And seeing as Apple isn't going to be removing safari from the iPhone anytime soon, explicit images are available for download from all over the internet right now on your iDevice.

So after the decision to remove iWobble Boobs from the App Store (For those of you in the dark about that app, it's a photo manipulation app, that enables you to wobble particular areas of a photo, be that boobs, a beer gut, jelly, whatever.) I wake up today to discover that Daisy Mae's Alien Buffet by IUGO Mobile Entertainment has been removed. This is a Dual Stick shooter, in the vein of Mini Gore, or iDracula. Its a bit of trashy fun, very B-Movie, with the Daisy Mae of the title cracking alien skulls in a cropped t-shirt and a pair of daisy dukes. I've enjoyed playing it. But I'm guessing Apple took umbrage to the way the lead characters Tomb Raider 1 styled polygons bounced their way around the field of battle. Attack of the Zombie Bikini Babes from Mars has also vanished. I guess the clue is in the name for that one.

Impressive pair.

Both Daisy Mae and AotZBBfM (What a mouthful) were no more racy and overtly sexual than the film, Lesbian Vampire Killers, which was not only available in the store, but was given away free in the UK via the 12 days of Christmas promotion a little over a month ago.

Grand Theft Auto Chinatown Wars is still selling just fine in the App Store. Killing people? Fine. Dealing Drugs? Fine. Stealing Cars? Fine. Show a bit of flesh? You're the devil incarnate. Apple's official stance on this is that Apps that are overtly sexual no longer meet the App Stores standards. So, violence is fine, but absolutely no sex! And that includes jiggling titty.

Boobs are scary stuff.

Interestingly, Sports Illustrated still have apps in the store, (Swimsuit editions no less.) as do Maxim. With the launch of the iPad imminent, Apple is supposedly courting publishers to have their content on the device. Given the popularity of men magazines, which are definately overtly sexual in their content, It will be interesting to see if Apple have the daddy bags to back this up and tell them, 'Sorry, no bikinis.'

I would like to see some consistency from Apple, Not this back and forth and this hypocritical stance they currently take. When will they just see sense and create an adult R17+ section of the store. So the children are 'safe' and the grownups can get back to wobbling whatever we choose.

Oooh yeah!

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